I learned the other day that our personalities aren't actually our true self. Deep, I know. That there are a couple layers that most of us live in that hide our actual being. This is the diagram I was presented:
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This makes sense to me. When you ask someone "Tell me about yourself." Even then people will usually revert to their occupation, where they are from or what species of dog they own. Depending on the relationship, some people may go even a little deeper and tell you about their past, maybe some of their trials and tribulations, their shame. But it's difficult for us to share our true identity, our basic self. It takes venerability and courage to be exposed like that.
When you cut through the personality and shame, you share your genuine strengths and weaknesses. The core underlying premises that you make your daily decisions on. I have hilarious, punny jokes that most people don't get. That's part of my personality and you're welcome. But obviously my morals aren't rooted in how the moon cuts his hair....eclipse it. Seriously though, if you want to escalate a relationship and really connect with someone, don't let your current character traits or past skeletons get in the way. Share what makes you tick over some tea...or maybe a cup of Joe.
Bringing it home here, just like the iPhone, throughout our lives we are going to have updates that change our personality and fix our bugs, but it's not going to change the 1st generation you. There are core features that your ethics are based on and it's pretty freeing when you own them no matter what that looks like. Surface level is neat, but not as fulfilling as letting your closest allies in on who you really are. Share a bit.
New in my life: Leaving the avocado seed in your guac doesn't keep it from turning brown, only tupperware can save your dip. Making mistakes means you're learning. There are four seasons in a year.
Keep smilin'
#goatlife
